Wednesday, August 26, 2009

"ughh ma...can i talk to you?"

So last week, August 19th to be exact, I came out to my mother. I've been wanting to tell her i'm bi for awhile but it neva seemed like the right time or i just couldnt get my mouth to spit those words out. But somehow on August 19th...i did it.

Suprisingly she took it a lot better than i thought she would, probably because i knew she knew. She told me when she started wondering if i was interested in the opposite sex and she knew exactly who the person was. I guess that kinda made the conversation a lil easier knowing that she knew who it was and for how long.
But none the less it was still kinda hard. I know a few people who didnt have such an easy experience coming out to their parents and i hate that. Even though my mother doesnt really accept it, she still wasnt that judgemental or negative and i love her for that. I really have tha best mommy a girl could ask for.

Of course the conversation did get weird because she started asking a bunch of questions. She thought that each time i had told her that i was goin to my "friend's" house that we hooked up...lol. I had to explain to her that it wasnt true. Yea we did hook up sometimes but not all tha time. Lol...it wasnt always sexual. And other uncomfortable questions followed but i couldnt give her all the answers, because some stuff she just doesnt need to know about. But im glad that she asked. She was still a lil uneasy bcuz she thought that i was gonna grow up to only like girls...become a lesbian. So i told her even though theres nothing wrong with lesbians or being a lesbian...i am not one. I let her  know that even though i am attracted to girls, i like guys better....always have.  I am gonna get married to a man (lol) and give her some grandbabies. She let out a big sigh of relief. That kinda upset me, but it was expected from her.

I ended the conversation by telling her you shouldnt be relieved that im not gay...you should be happy for me no matter what. She then hugged me and said Morg I'll always love you no matter what but you cant be mad at me for how i feel. I looked at her and smiled....then hugged her back. :)

Im really glad to have told her. She's been hinting for me to tell her for awhile, so to finally get it off my chest was a big step.

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